Definition Creating Limitation?

by Theresa Maguire | Updated on April 25, 2024 | Published on August 2, 2022

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My Dear Friend,

Is your definition of yourself creating limitation in your life?  

What if letting go of definition could create more possibility and experiences?  

Would you be willing to allow yourself to be undefined, so you can experience all that you already are + all that you are willing to become? 

The Expectation of Definition

Oh, how my mom loves her hats! 

She has quite the collection of “newsboy caps” in a variety of colors and garnishes. While the style is the same, the way they are adorned ranges from simple to elaborate, from practical to fancy and everything in between.

Her hats are not just the finishing touch to her outfit, but they are an extension of who she is.

Each hats represents one of the many ways she defines herself to the outside world.  And, they provide her with familiarity and comfort when embracing the new and unpredictable.

While I’m not a big “hat” person myself, I too have defined myself through the roles I’ve played, the jobs I’ve held, and the personality I present to others.

Throughout the years I’ve worn the daughter, sister, wife, mom, friend, student, teacher, event planner, entrepreneur, shy, outspoken, bored, confident, and happy hats and the list goes on.

Each of these roles defined me. And, each role came with a set of expectations.

These expectations are the rules inherent in our society passed down from generation to generation. Unspoken and subtle or learned through our cultural norms, our parents, our teachers, our employers, the movies we watch, the books we read, the songs we listen to and the friends we keep.  

The definition gives us structure, a road map, an understanding of how we are to behave, respond, and perform within the roles we choose.

When we communicate the label to another, the other immediately knows who we are by how the label has defined us.

But, in the act of defining us, we also limit ourselves to be seen only as that role.

When we are defined, we are confined.

Take for example, the actor that gets typecast in comedies; they become known for that role and are seen as only being able to act in that particular genre.

The same is true in work situations. The titles you are given confine you to fulfill only those tasks or behaviors that are associated with that position.  You become limited by the boundaries of the role. That is why people feel the need to go to a different company so they can step into a different role.

It’s not only the roles that we play that define us, it’s also our behaviors, our emotions and our thoughts.

How many times have you heard someone describe you in terms that may or may not be flattering, may or may not be true about you?

When we label another person based on how they are acting or words they are saying that is how we will see them every time we interact with them whether it is really who they are or not.<

While we can see how being defined by our roles and behaviors limits how we are perceived by others, what about the labels we place on ourselves?

What impact do they have on how we see ourselves?  What limitations do they have on being able to achieve our goals?

Identifying where definition is creating limitation in your life

The first step towards achieving any goal, is to identify where your thoughts, feelings and behaviors have been defining you in ways that sabotage you from taking action.

If you are ready to let go of the stuff that has been stopping you stepping into the next version of who you dream to be, let’s talk

Shifting your thoughts, feelings and behaviors will allow you to take action from an undefined point of view. 

If you have a colleague who can benefit from these tips, please share this article with them.

Theresa Maquire

Big Hugs,
Theresa

My dear friend I believe that when we are aligned with our soul calling we will thrive in every aspect of our human experience. I help women reconnect with their authenticity, know their truth, master a loving mindset, and make themselves a priority in their lives.  Because when you let go of how you've been defined you'll uncover who you truly are. 

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